Happy fathers day

Every Father’s Day I see so many people around the nation celebrating such an amazing day to acknowledge how great their fathers have been. In the same breath, I asked myself, where is mine? I wanted to be just like the other families who were able to celebrate with their dad by hugging him and kissing him and everything that a young kid should experience, but that was not the case. 
 
I did not have the experience of playing catch or shooting hoops or his support at my games to say “great job”. I did not have my dad to talk to about women or how to become a man. I did not have my dad to take me fishing or go on boys’ trips. Although I’ve dreamed of these events, that support remained a fiction image in my imagination. 
 
I felt as I got older, does this man not love me? What did I do wrong? Is there something wrong with me? 
 
These were the thoughts I had throughout the course of my life. The older I got, the question remained, where is he? Where was he when I graduated high school or college? Where was he when I received different awards for my academics? Where was he? I screamed out but never could figure out. I hated him and for reasons, I could not explain. 
 
Today, I am 28 years old and it’s been nearly a decade since the last time I spoke to my father. I have pondered over the years, and come to the conclusion that my dad does love me and maybe had a hard time showing it. I have heard stories about him from people in Columbia that would bring a smile to my face. My dad was a hard-working man and would bust his tail to make sure that he would get the job done. 
 
Currently, I do not have a relationship with my dad. However, I am here to say I love you and Happy Father's day! I hope someday we can have that father and son talk and get to know each other. Although I did not have a relationship with my dad, I am thankful for my mentors who took on that role to help me throughout my life. 
 
To My Father Figures: Thank You
Thank you to my mentors who played such a key role in my life for helping me develop into the man I am today. I want to first thank my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ for giving me so much grace through my emotions and for teaching me how to love. 
 
Thank you to my Uncle George “King Fish” King. You were there for me when I didn’t understand why my dad wasn’t. I remember you’d say “nephew, let's go for a ride and get a car wash” and during those times we talked about everything you could imagine. You taught me a life lesson on how to be a man and reminded me that an absent father doesn’t have to affect me as a successful man. I remember you bought my first car and when you brought it to me, I cried. But like a dad, you hugged and said you loved me. I have not misplaced these moments, instead, I will cherish them forever as you are now in heaven. 
 
Thank you to Lloyd Henry. As a Black man, you have always been someone, I looked up too. You showed me a dedication to hard work that I have never seen before. Even more important, you illustrated to me how Black excellence should look. Since I was a kid, you took me under your wing and I’ll never forget you for that.
 
Thank you to Tom Ratermann. What a journey it has been from my mom taking care of you and Mary Beth’s kids at grant elementary. I’ll never forget the level of support you’ve provided to help me graduate from college. I remember coming to your house and staying until midnight, sometimes, and you were always there to help. I remember you and your family always inviting me over for dinner and made me feel like a part of your family. I remember you teaching me different ways to make a knot with rope tying up things to the truck. You have played a crucial part in my journey and I am thankful that you call me family.
 
Thank you to “Mr. Bill” Logan. I appreciate everything you have done for me throughout my life. When I was in a challenging situation, you never hesitated to come and help me. You always showed me grace even when it may have been difficult. You always check on me and tell me that you are praying for me. You have been such a blessing in my life, and you have been a part of why I am the man today. 
                                            
Lastly, thank you to my mom who I think is the greatest woman in the world for raising me into the man I am today. You busted your tail to ensure there was food on the table every day, even when there were times you did not have enough for yourself. I have not forgotten those sacrifices and I never will. 
 
I’ll never forget those late nights you were helping me with my homework. I’ll never forget those games you attended even if I wasn’t playing. I’ll never forget your support, sitting behind my bench as I coached. I’ll never forget every time I was sick and in the hospital, you were right by my side. Fulfilling both roles of a mother and father and I’ll never forget! I am who I am because of YOU and never forget that!!!
 
Single Mothers: Thank You
To every mother who is raising their kids without the presence of a father, I want you to know that you are AMAZING! Your kids will never forget the hard work and sacrifices you have given them. God has a blessing with your name on it. When there are days that you feel you can’t do it, call on God, he is always there to listen. You are loved.
 
To the kids who have been without the presence of a father, overtime I challenge you to find it in you to show them grace as you continue to get older. Trust me, I know it is hard and there can be a lot of emotion that goes through your body. But, I am here to say you are not alone! Times may be hard, but you will get through it. Always dream to become the very thing you want to be in life. It can be a teacher, police officer, doctor, professional sports player, anything you want to be, all it takes is for you to start to dream. You are special and you are meant to shine. Always look to your mentors for guidance (e.g., teachers, coaches, pastors, family, friends, God) just as I did, and I promise you that you will be fine. You are loved.
 
Happy Father’s Day to all!


I want to wish you all a Happy Father’s Day and know that I love you with all my heart!